angel's blog

hey evrybdy..
sorry cudnt write anythng for so long..
me been busy wid loadsa thngs, had sm real hard choices to make abt my life etc..more on that later..
anyway so nice that u ppl still remember me!!
thts really awesome!
wishing ya all a belated yet heartfelt happy new year...
btw, i got a new puppy, named Lucky, she is a white labrador. i will post her pic up.
luv n hugs,
angel.

(The last lullaby by a mother who lost her baby)

Sleep, oh my baby, sleep in my lap,
Sleep, free of care, regret, pain and mishap.
Let me sing for you once, oh my dear baby,
For tomorrow the angels will sing your lullaby.

So sweet and pure and lovable you were,
So full was the joy you spread everywhere.
God didn't want this world's hurt to touch you,
And He called you back to his lap, where you belong true.

Before you go,dearest, here's my parting gift,
My last lullaby, baby, my last ever gift.
So sleep, oh my baby, sleep in my lap,
Let me sing for you, as you take your last nap.

When I looked into your eyes,
And told you I'm yours,
You thought I meant it all,
But I only wanted you to fall.

I told you you're mine,
Oh so true, you were mine,
You loved me with your soul,
I thought it rock-and-roll.

You wrote me love in blood,
I wrote back - ink, blood red.
You tattoed my name in arm,
I thought I'm full of charm.

Till one day I got bored,
And told you 'you are sour',
I knew I broke your heart,
But cared not, played my part.

Then they found you dead,
With my name drawn in blood,
I cared not, neither cried,
Not bothered, not e'en tried.

Then you came back to me,
Watched and followed me.
Every single night,
You came in dreams of fright.

You chased me in shadows,
In rain and sun and smows.
I cried, I laughed in fear,
You scared me - mortal fear.

But I knew you would stay,
Forever with me, you would stay.
Tonight when rope ends all,
I know you are waiting for my fall.

Alone in a wide world i stand,
Hoping for a kindly word, a glance,
Alone without shelter I run,
Devoid of laughter, of fun.

Seeking for extremes I know not,
Yearning for pleasures I feel not,
And somewhere, in this race for more,
Lost I, my love, forever gone.

Riches of the world I did earn,
Tricks of the trade I did learn,
Fame came, and fortune came,
I had, yes, mastered life's game.

In the mirror I see me attired
In finesse, but my eyes are tired,
They see, not the stranger in mirror,
But an empty soul, a life lost forever.

Im confused
Is it the world that is wrong,
Or is it me who's odd?

Why is there pain in my heart,
Why is there fear in the dark?
Why is there joy in first love,
Why is there guilt in the wrong?

Im confused

What is there real in this world,
What is the fulfillment of life?
Why are we here, in this place,
Why is there birth, and why death?

Im confused

Why is there hope in unknown,
Why is there faith in Unseen?
Why is there dawn after night,
Why are now tears in my eyes?

*******
luv,
angel

WHAT TREE DID YOU FALL FROM?

>

> Find your birthday and then find your tree. This is really cool and

> somewhat accurate, also in line with Celtic astrology. Then send it to

> all your friends, including the one that sent it to you, so they can find

> out what tree they fell from, but don't forget to change the subject line to

> your tree.

>

> Dec 23 to Jan 01 - Apple Tree

> Jan 01 to Jan 11 - Fir Tree

> Jan 12 to Jan 24 - Elm Tree

> Jan 25 to Feb 03 - Cypress Tree

> Feb 04 to Feb 08 - Poplar Tree

> Feb 09 to Feb 18 - Cedar Tree

> Feb 19 to Feb 28 - Pine Tree

> Mar 01 to Mar 10 - Weeping Willow Tree

> Mar 11 to Mar 20 - Lime Tree

> Mar 21 (only) -Oak Tree

> Mar 22 to Mar 31 - Hazelnut Tree

> Apr 01 to Apr 10 - Rowan Tree

> Apr 11 to Apr 20 - Maple Tree

> Apr 21 to Apr 30 - Walnut Tree

> May 01 to May 14 - Poplar Tree

> May 15 to May 24 - Chestnut Tree

> May 25 to Jun 03 - Ash Tree

> Jun 04 to Jun 13 - Hornbeam Tree

> Jun 14 to Jun 23 - Fig Tree

> Jun 24 (only) - Birch Tree

> Jun 25 to Jul 04 - Apple Tree

> Jul 05 to Jul 14 - Fir Tree

> Jul 15 to Jul 25 -Elm Tree

> Jul 26 to Aug 04 - Cypress Tree

> Aug 05 to Aug 13 - Poplar Tree

> Aug 14 to Aug 23 - Cedar Tree

> Aug 24 to Sep 02 - Pine Tree

> Sep 03 to Sep 12 - Weeping Willow Tree

> Sep 13 to Sep 22 - Lime Tree

> Sep 23 (only) - Olive Tree

> Sep 24 to Oct 03 - Hazelnut Tree

> Oct 04 to Oct 13 - Rowan Tree

> Oct 14 to Oct 23 - Maple Tree

> Oct 24 to Nov 11 - Walnut Tree

> Nov 12 to Nov 21 - Chestnut Tree

> Nov 22 to Dec 01 - Ash Tree

> Dec 02 to Dec 11 - Hornbeam Tree

> Dec 12 to Dec 21 - Fig Tree

> Dec 22 (only) - Beech Tree

>

> YOUR TREE (in alphabetical order)

>

> Apple Tree (Love) -- Quiet and shy at times, lots of charm, appeal, and

> attraction, pleasant attitude, flirtatious smile, adventurous,

> sensitive,loyal in love, wants to love and be loved, faithful and tender

> partner, very generous, many talents, loves children, needs affectionate

> partner.

>

> Ash Tree (Ambition) -- Extremely attractive, vivacious, impulsive,

> demanding, does not care for criticism, ambitious, intelligent,

> talented, likes to play with fate, can be very egotistic, reliable, restless

> lover,sometimes money rules over the heart, demands attention, needs

> love and much emotional support.

>

> Beech Tree (Creative) -- Has good taste, concerned about its looks,

> materialistic, good organization of life and career, economical,

> good leader, takes no unnecessary risks, reasonable, splendid lifetime

> companion, keen on keeping fit (diets, sports, etc.).

>

> Birch Tree (Inspiration) -- Vivacious, attractive, elegant, friendly,

> unpretentious, modest, does not like anything in excess, abhors the

> vulgar, loves life in nature and in calm, not very passionate, full of

> imagination, little ambition, creates a calm and content atmosphere.

>

> Cedar Tree (Confidence) -- Of rare strength, knows how to adapt, likes

> unexpected presents, of good health, not in the least shy, tends to look

> down on others, self-confident, a great speaker, determined, often

> impatient, likes to impress others, has many talents, industrious,

> healthy optimism, waits for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.

>

> Chestnut Tree (Honesty) -- Of unusual stature, impressive,

> well-developed, sense of justice, fun to be around, a planner, born diplomat, can be

> irritated easily, sensitive of others feelings, hard worker, sometimes

> acts superior, feels not understood at times, fiercely family oriented, very

> loyal in love, physically fit.

>

> Cypress Tree (Faithfulness) -- strong, muscular, adaptable, takes what

> life has to give but doesn't necessarily like it, strives to be content,

> optimistic, wants to be financially independent, wants love and

> affection, hates loneliness, passionate lover which cannot be satisfied, faithful,

> quick-tempered at times, can be unruly and careless, loves to gain

> knowledge, needs to be needed.

>

> Elm Tree (Noble-mindedness) -- Pleasant shape, tasteful clothes, Modest

> demands, tends not to forgive mistakes, cheerful, likes to lead but not

> to obey, honest and faithful partner, likes making decisions for

> others,noble-minded, generous, good sense of humor, practical.

>

> Fig Tree (Sensibility) -- very strong minded, a bit self-willed,

> honest,loyal, independent, hates contradiction or arguments, hard worker

> when wants to be, loves life and friends, enjoys children and animals,

> few Sexual relationships, great sense of humor, has artistic talent and

> great intelligence.

>

> Fir tree (Mysterious) -- extraordinary taste, handles stress well, loves

> anything beautiful, stubborn, tends to care for those close to them,

> hard to trust others, yet a social butterfly, likes idleness and laziness

> after long demanding hours at work, rather modest, talented, unselfish, many

> friends, very Reliable.

>

> Hazelnut Tree (Extraordinary) -- Charming, sense of humor, very

> demanding but can also be very understanding, knows how to make a lasting

> impression, Active fighter for social causes and politics, popular, quite moody,

> sexually oriented, honest, a perfectionist, has a precise sense of

> judgment and expects complete fairness.

>

> Hornbeam Tree (Good Taste) -- Of cool beauty, cares for its looks and

> condition, good taste, is not egoistic, makes life as comfortable as

> possible, leads a reasonable and disciplined life, looks for kindness

> and acknowledgment in an emotional partner, dreams of unusual lovers, is

> seldom Happy with its feelings, mistrusts most people, is never sure of

> its decisions, very conscientious.

>

> Lime Tree (Doubt) - intelligent, hard working, accepts what life dishes

> out, but not before trying to change bad circumstances into good ones,

> hates fighting and stress, enjoys getaway vacations, may appear tough,

> but is actually soft and relenting, always willing to make sacrifices for

> family and friends, Has many talents but not always enough time to use

> them, can become a complainer, great leadership qualities, is jealous at

> times but extremely loyal.

>

> Maple Tree (Independence of Mind) -- No ordinary person, full of

> imagination and originality, shy and reserved, ambitious, proud,

> self-confident, hungers for new experiences, sometimes nervous, has many

> complexities, good memory, learns easily, complicated love life, wants

> to impress.

>

> Oak Tree (Brave) -- robust nature, courageous, strong, unrelenting,

> independent, sensible, does not like change, keeps its feet on the

> ground, person of action

>

> Olive Tree (Wisdom) -- Loves sun, warmth and kind feelings,

> reasonable,balanced, avoids aggression and violence, tolerant, cheerful,

> calm, well-developed sense of justice, sensitive, empathetic, free of

> jealousy,loves to read and the company of sophisticated people.

>

> Pine Tree (Peacemaker) -- Loves agreeable company, craves peace and

> harmony, loves to help others, active imagination, likes to write

> poetry, not fashion conscious, great compassion, friendly to all, falls strongly

> in love but will leave if betrayed or lied to, emotionally soft, low self

> esteem, needs affection and reassurance.

>

> Poplar Tree (Uncertainty) -- Looks very decorative, talented, not very

> self-confident, extremely courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and

> pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, great

> artistic nature, good organizer, tends to lean toward philosophy,

> reliable in any situation, takes partnership seriously.

>

> Rowan Tree (Sensitivity) -- Full of charm, cheerful, gifted without

> egoism to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest, and even complications,

> is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate,

> emotional, good company, forgives.

>

> Walnut Tree (Passion) -- Unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts,

> often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions,

> spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon

> partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very

> jealous and passionate, no compromise.

>

> Weeping Willow (Melancholy) - Likes to be stress free, loves family

> life, full of hopes and dreams, attractive, very empathetic, loves anything

> beautiful, musically inclined, loves to travel to exotic places,

> restless, capricious, honest, can be influenced but is not easy to live with when

> pressured, sometimes demanding, good intuition, suffers in love until

> they find that one loyal, steadfast partner; loves to make others laugh.

hi..
dis is a forward i got..check it out..it worked like magic for me..

This is quite amazing and fun to do.

>> FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS -

>

> > DO NOT CHEAT

>

> > OR IT WON'T WORK AND YOU WILL WISH YOU HADNT.

>

> > THIS GAME HAS A FUNNY / CREEPY OUTCOME.

>

> > IT TAKES ABOUT 3 MINUTES - WORTH A TRY

>

>> 1st. Get PEN and PAPER

>

> > 2nd. WHEN CHOOSING NAMES, MAKE SURE THEY ARE REAL PEOPLE THAT YOU ACTUALLY KNOW

> >

>

> > 3rd. GO WITH YOUR FIRST INSTINCTS Very important for good
results.

>

> >

> > 4th. SCROLL DOWN

>

> >

> > ONE LINE AT THE TIME

>

> > 1. On a blank sheet of paper, WRITE NUMBERS 1 through 11 in a COLUMN on the LEFT.

>

> >

> > 2. BESIDE the NUMBERS 1 2,

>

>>WRITE DOWN ANY 2 NUMBERS YOU WANT.

>

> >

>

> >

>

> > 3. BESIDE the NUMBERS 3 7,

> > WRITE DOWN THE NAMES OF TWO MEMBERS

> > OF THE OPPOSITE SEX.

>

> >

>

> >

>

>> 4. WRITE ANYONE'S NAME (Like FRIENDS or FAMILY...)

> > next to 4, 5, 6.

>

> >

>

> >

>

>> 5. WRITE down FOUR SONG TITLES in 8, 9, 10, 11

>

> >

>

> >

>

> >

>

> > ARE YOU READY?

>

> > HERE IS THE

> > KEY TO THE GAME

>

> >

>

> >

> >

>

> > 1. THE NUMBER of PEOPLE YOU MUST TELL ABOUT THIS GAME is found in SPACE 2

>

> >

>

2. THE PERSON IN SPACE 3 IS THE ONE YOU LOVE

>

> >

>

> >

> > 3. THE PERSON YOU LIKE but your relationship CANNOT WORK is in
SPACE 7

>

> >

>

> >

> 4. YOU CARE MOST about the PERSON you put in SPACE 4

>

> >

>

> > 5. THE PERSON YOU NAME IN NUMBER 5 IS THE ONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL.

>

> >

>

> >

> 6. THE PERSON YOU NAMED IN 6 IS THE YOUR LUCKY STAR

>

> >

>

> >

>

> > 7. THE SONG IN 8 IS THE SONG THAT MATCHES WITH THE PERSON IN NUMBER 3

>

> >

>

> >

>

> >8. THE TITLE IN 9 IS THE SONG FOR THE PERSON IN 7

>

> >

>

> >

9. THE 10TH SPACE IS THE SONG THAT TELLS YOU MOST ABOUT YOUR MIND

>

> >

>

> >

> 10. AND 11 IS THE SONG TELLING HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT LIFE

>

> >

>

> >

>

> > 11. NUMBER 1 IS YOUR LUCKY NUMBER

>

> >

>

STRANGE HOW IT SEEMS TO WORK.

luv,
angel

hi,

u must try this site - it reads ur mind and it actually works!!i tried every time i tried!!

http://www.mysticalball.com/

i wonder how they do it....

luv,
angel.

Birthdays: (Look below for your characteristics)

January 01 - 09 ~ Dog
January 10 - 24 ~ Mouse
January 25 - 31 ~ Lion

February 01 - 05 ~ Cat
February 06 - 14 ~ Dove
February 15 - 21 ~ Turtle
February 22 - 28 ~ Panther

March 01 - 12 ~ Monkey
March 13 - 15 ~ Lion
March 16 - 23 ~ Mouse
March 24 - 31 ~ Cat

April 01 - 03 ~ Dog
April 04 - 14 ~ Panther
April 15 - 26 ~ Mouse
April 27 - 30 ~ Turtle

May 01 - 13 ~ Monkey
May 14 - 21 ~ Dove
May 22 - 31 ~ Lion

June 01 - 03 ~ Mouse
June 04 - 14 ~ Turtle
June 15 - 20 ~ Dog
June 21 - 24 ~ Monkey
June 25 - 30 ~ Cat

July 01 - 09 ~ Mouse
July 10 - 15 ~ Dog
July 16 - 26 ~ Dove
July 27 - 31 ~ Cat

August 01 - 15 ~ Monkey
August 16 - 25 ~ Mouse
August 26 - 31 ~ Turtle

September 01 - 14 ~ Dove
September 15 - 27 ~ Cat
September 28 - 30 ~ Dog

October 01 - 15 ~ Monkey
October 16 - 27 ~ Turtle
October 28 - 31 ~ Panther

November 01 - 16 ~ Lion
November 17 - 30 ~ Cat

December 01 - 16 ~ Dog
December 17 - 25 ~ Monkey
December 26 - 31 ~ Dove

If you are a Dog: A very loyal and sweet person. Your loyalty can never be doubted. You are quite honest and sincere when it comes to your attitude towards working. You are a very simple person, indeed. Absolutely hassle free, humble and down-to-earth!! That explains the reason why your friends cling on to you! You have a good taste for clothes. If your wardrobe is not updated with what is trendy, you sure are depressed. Popular and easy-going. You have a little group of dignified friends, all of them being quality-personified.

If you are a Mouse: Always up to some sort of a mischief! The mischievous gleam in your eyes is what makes you so cute and attractive to everyone. You are an extremely fun-to-be-with kind of person. No wonder, people seek for your company and look forwa rd to include you for all get-together. However, you are sensitive, which is a drawback. People need to select their words while talking to you. If someone tries to fiddle around and play with words while dealing with you, it is enough to invite your wrath. God bless the person then!

If you are a Lion: Quite contradictory to your name, you are a peace loving person. You best try to avoid a situation wherein you are required to fight. An outdoor person, you dislike sitting at one place for a long duration. You are a born leader, and have it in you how to tactfully derive work from people. You love being loved, and when you receive your share of limelight from someone, you are all theirs!!!! Well, well... hence some people could even take an advantage, flatter you to the maximum and get their work done. So be careful.....

If you are a Cat: An extremely lovable, adorable pe rson, sometimes shy, with a passion for quick wit. At times, you prefer quietness. You love exploring various things and going into depth of each thing. Under normal circumstances you're cool, when given a reason to, you are like a volcano waiting to erupt. You're a fashion bird. People look forward to you as an icon associated with fashion. Basically, you mingle along freely but don't like talking much to strangers. People feel very easy in your company. You observe care in choosing your friends.

If you are a Turtle: You are near to perfect and nice at heart. The examples of your kindness are always circulated in groups of people. You, too, love peace. You wouldn't like to retaliate even to a person who is in the wrong. You are loved due to this. You do not wish to talk behind one's back. People love the way you always treat them. You can give, give and give love, and the best part is that you do not expect it back in return.Y ou are generous enough.Seeing things in a practical light is what remains the best trait of you guys.

If you are a Dove: You symbolize a very happy-go-lucky approach in life.Whatever the surroundings may be, grim or cheerful, you remain unaffected.In fact, you spread cheer wherever you go. You are the leader of your group of friends and good at consoling people in their times of need. You dislike hypocrisy and tend to shirk away from hypocrites. They can never be in your good books, no matter what. You are very methodical and organized in your work. No amount of mess, hence, can ever encompass you. Beware, it is easy for you to fall in love....

If you are a Panther: You are mysterious. You are someone who can handle pressure with ease, and can handle any atmosphere without going berserk. You can be mean at times, and lo ve to gossip with your selected group. Very prim and proper. You like all situations and things to be in the way you desire, which, sometimes is not possible. As a result, you may lose out in some relationships. But otherwise, you love to help people out from difficult and tight spots when they really need you.

If you are a Monkey: Very impatient and hyper!!! You want things to be done as quickly as possible. At heart, you are quite simple and love if you are the center of attraction. That way, you people are unique. You would like to keep yourself safe from all the angles. Shall your name be dragged or featured in any sort of a controversy, you then go all panicky. Therefore, you take your precautions from the very beginning. When you foresee anything wrong, your sixth sense is what saves you from falling in traps. Quite a money minded bunch you people are!!

___________________________________________________________________

did it work for u?im a dove by the way, and i think it worked for me...

kuv,
angel.

hi..

im sharing a wonderful forward i got..
pls read through..

a very nice reflection to share......

my mom only had one eye.
i hated her... she was such an embarressment..
my mom ran a small shop at a flea market.
she collected little weeds and such to sell...
anything for the money we needed
she was such an embarressment.
there was this one day during elementary school..
it was field day, and my mom came.
i was so embarressed. how could she do this to
me? i threw her a hateful look and ran out.

the next day at school...
"your mom only has one eye?!?!" ..and they taunted me.
i wished that my mom would just dissappear from this world
so i said to my mom,
"mom.. why dont you have the other eye?!
if you're only gonna make me a laughingstock,
why dont you just die?!!!"
my mom did not respond..
i guess i felt a little bad, but at the same time, it
felt good to think that i had said what i'd wanted to
say all this time..
maybe it was because my mom hadnt punished me,
but i didnt think that i had hurt her feelings very badly.

that night...
i woke up, and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water.
my mom was crying there, so quietly, as if she
was afraid that she might wake me.
i took a look at her, then turned away.
because of the thing i had said to her earlier, there
was something pinching at me in the corner of my heart.
even so, i hated my mother who was crying out of
her one eye. so i told myself that i would grow up
and become successful.
cause i hated my one-eyed mom and our desperate poverty..

then i studied real hard.
i left my mother and came to Seoul and studied,
and got accepted in the Seoul University with all
the confidence i had.

then, i got married.
i bought a house of my own.
then i had kids, too..
now i'm living happily as a successful man.
i like it here because it's a place that doesnt
remind me of my mom.

this happiness was getting bigger and bigger, when..

what?!
who's this?!
...it was my mother...
..still with her one eye.
it felt as if the whole sky was falling apart on me.
my little girl ran away, scared of my mom's eye.
and i asked her,

"who are you?!"
"i dont know you!!!" as if trying to make that real. i
screamed at her," how dare you come to my house and scare my daughter!"

"GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!"

and to this, my mother quietly answered,
"oh, i'm so sorry. i may have gotten the wrong address,"
and she dissappeared out of sight.

thank goodness... she doesn't recognize me..
i was quite relieved.

i told myself that i wasnt going to care, or think
about this for the rest of my life.
then a wave of relief came upon me...

one day, a letter regarding a school reunion came
to my house. so, lying to my wife that i was going
on a business trip, i went.
after the reunion, i went down to the old shack,
that i used to call a house...just out of curiosity

there, i found my mother fallen on the cold ground.
but i did not shed a single tear.
she had a piece of paper in her hand.... it was a letter to me.

my son...
i think my life has been long enough now..

and... i wont visit Seoul anymore...
but would it be too much to ask if i wanted you to
come visit me once in a while?
i miss you so much.. and i was so glad when i
heard you were coming for the reunion.
but i decided not to go to the school.
...for you...
and i'm sorry that i only have one eye, and i was
an embarressment for you.

you see, when you were very little, you got into an
accident, and lost your eye. as a mom, i couldnt
stand watching you having to grow up with only
one eye... so i gave you mine...
i was so proud of my son that was seeing a whole
new world for me, in my place, with that eye. i
was never upset at you for anything you did.. the
couple times that you were angry with me,.. i
thought to myself, 'it's because he loves me..'

my son... oh, my son...
i dont want you to cry for me, because of my death.

please dont cry...
my son, i love you so much

_______________________________

i jus cried.
luv,
angel.